scattered

my mind is scattered...  it is like an autofocus lens, struggling to focus.. i can hear the cranks going back and forth... zoom... zoom...

i have many irons in the fire right now, which is great - i have been given many great opportunities recently - and i am jumping on them... but.. still.. i feel scattered... maybe i am just tired. if you saw the dark circles under my eyes, you would agree... maybe i am trying to do too much at once... maybe i am terrible at time management... which i think i am. I am great @ Crunch time... though.. but leading up to crunch time i am so easily distracted.... i can focus on the urgent... but i will focus on the non important urgent... first... which is not smart. i know.

i think i am just tired...  feeling overwhelmed and a ton of pressure... money is ok now, it will be tight in a few months... i have some things that are going well... towards the tipping point... but i get scared... everyone so often, fear grips me and i cannot breathe...

i am staying up way too late...  i need to sleep - that is what my problem is today.. and then i get overwhelmed and panicky when i don't sleep... i feel like every minute i am not doing something, i am failing...

i am working to find the balance of being home... new job of a househould... and building two businesses... and keeping my sanity to balance it all... how do super women do it?

tomorrow will be a new day... and I will be bright eyed and busy tailed... maybe a power nap is in order