Finding my way...

the best laid plans.......

of mice and women... often go awry.........

Well... I have always LOVED to bake... bake bread... bake yummy treats..  love it.. my waistline does NOT... so I stopped a lot of the baking. And let's face it, no one wants their oven on here in the AZ heat! hahah

So I had a wild hair yesterday. I really miss baking... and well I thought I would start out to make some homemade wheat bread. We only eat wheat bread in this house... with the occasional splurge of sourdough for a yummy sandwhich treat... So I had to run to the store for ginger-ale... Hank was sick yesterday (puking sick!) and I picked up some fresh yeast (I had all the other ingredients) and I got out the bread maker, dusted it off and WHala.... measured, poured and assembled... there is something I love about making bread by hand... it relaxes me and gives me a sense of a job completed... well, using the bread maker is not making it by hand... but the ingredients are pure (no high fructose corn syrup, and YES it is in wheat bread from the store! check the label)

So, got it all set up. pressed the right buttons... start..........  Then I have a bunch of meetings yesterday back to back... this cycle takes 3 hours.... so when I smell the baking part I go to peak.. ACK!

the dough never fully formed, it was still dry and powdery... no I wonder, did i put in enough water
? did I put in any water.. you know how sometimes when you are doing something your brain goes on auto pilot... and functions while you are a million miles away.. oh wait, does this only happen to me? i hope not! Anyway - UGH -  have to dump it alland start over.

So i find the user guide for the breadmaker online.. as I am sure mine is filed somewhere in oblivion.. I find a recipe for Banana Bread.. which I love to make from scratch... so I try this recipe...  i am salivating at the thought of some delish banana bread - made in the bread maker...

By this time Jeff is home cooking dinner and the dough is looking great - I remembered to check the dough ball this time.. all looks good...! AS we are talking while he is cooking the bake cycle begins... Will and I are playing a dice game at the table while Jeff cooks.. Hank is sicker than a dog (where does this expression come from?) - on the sofa.

I look over and the bread maker is SMOKING.. white smoke is drifting out of the top.. ugh.... I hollar to Jeff, he pulls the plug... the dough had over flown the bread box thing - during the bake cycle and had spilled down over onto the heating elements.. NOT  good smell. We open all the windows.... turn on all the fans.... yuck. I am so bummed... twice now failure.. NOW i am more than determined to make this work and beat the machine! UGH.. it is a sticky goooey mess.. Jeff kindly suggests that I quit for the evening, let the gooey mess dry so it is easier to clean off from inside the machine... I give in... I really want to try again right away to prove to myself I am not an idiot... but I decide to start fresh in the morning!

The image from inside the bread maker is AFTER i scooped out most of the goo....

So, i started fresh this morning. cleaned out the machine (not fun - but a whole lot easier when the goo was hard and could be scraped off)

So far, it looks good.. i will keep a close eye on it... it is a new recipe too.. wheat bread... all wheat flour with some brown sugar... should be yum-o! I will keep ya posted....

so.. what do you do for work?

I am always asking this question to new people that I meet. I am so curious... what do they do for a living.. it is fun to hear different jobs...  you can tell who is passionate about it.. and who just works at a j.o.b.  .... i get it.. I have been thinking lately about jobs.. and work... i have a great job.. i work from home.. get paid very well... but it is a contract job... not all that stable... but the money is good and the work is fun... it is very stressfull tho.. so i guess there are tradeoffs...

I have been thinking about jobs lately... i always stress about my job... will i keep it, will it go away.. etc... some days i am a bit compulsive about it... some days, I am ok... i started thinking does this job define me? i have a hard time shutting off job mode... i think it is partly because I WAH (work from home..hehe) and partly because I am a workaholic... i know this.. always have been.. always have struggled to maintain balance.. then I started thinking..  i need to focus this energy towards my home as well... that is the thing that gets left out... last priority... rasing a family, managing the personal schedules, planning the meals, planning personal lives.. dr. visits, schooling, etc... adovcating for your child, yourself, an aging parent is a full time job too.. now that job does not pay in dollars.. but the rewards are much more valuable... i wish somedays, i would be 100% stay at home.. focused solely on the household and family.. but today, i cannot... but i can give more effort... turn off work mode at 5pm.. (or whatever time i usually finish) - and focus more - as a home project manager... it would keep me from feeling as though I am scrambling all the time, what is for dinner... what appt do we have tonight? when is the next dr.visit? who has to go where? is the laundry done? do the kids need shots? when do we have to buy school supplies? where did all that dust come from.... 

this is the age old battle.. of the working mom... or workingat home mom... the guilt of working... the guilt of piles of dirty laundry, or fast food dinners... you all know exactly what I am talking about... i think i am still searching for my balance... i would love a job that i did not have to worry about (recession proof) that paid well... gave me flexibility... ooh that would be the photog biz.. eh? or just a well paying job that i didn't bring home every night.. this job is always on my mind...  i think i am rambling now... what i need is a warm fuzzy... maybe that is a nightly night cap, maybe that is a half o zanax to control my anxiety, maybe that is a full bank account, or maybe it is a hobby.. or a clean house... or a guarantee that work is ok... no layoffs... all of those things are warm fuzzies... i just know i need one..

coming home.....

well... i watched a lot of Tv when i was a kid... as the only child living at home, i was responsible for entertainin myself.. I would read alot... i would go outside and use my imagination w. imaginary friends and imaginary adventures.. and I would watch tv. My parents watched a lot of tv and therefore so did i..

One show that I watched pretty regularly and then watched in reruns as well.. was Mary Tyler Moore... I know I have blogged about it before.. in fact, when I went to Minneapolis for work, i made sure to find her statue downtown and take a photo... I looked up to her... she was a working woman on her own... she had her own apartment, her own friends, she dated... she was not the typical housewife that i saw on TV at that time (now please don't be mad at me... there is nothing wrong w. staying home w. the kids, I have done and LOVED it.. and sort of do it now... what i mean is... she was not married w. kids as most of the women on TV at that time) And she was SMART... (not like the dumba$$ girls on Threes company, another show for another blog).. I just wanted to be MARY when I grew up...

today on Oprah, she had a reunion show of the cast on a replica of the set.. it brought back so many memories for me - i got a little emotional.. how funny is that... a show - a tv show - meant something ot me.. it was my friend and she was someone that i looked up to.... anyway - I always wanted to turn the world on w. a smile.

updates.... @ Chez Peterson

Well.... it is a busy world @ Chez Peterson...

This past weekend... was busy but loads of fun and hard work...

Fri night: - Jeff and I went out w. out the kids to a friends house for margarita's and a birthday celebration! We had a wonderful time - laughing it up w. friends... Jeff also worked from home on Friday and we went to lunch together (a nice treat to spend some time together!) and ended up securing 5 gift certs to various local business to raffle off for our Relay Kick-off meeting on Saturday! WHOOHOO - we talked to some great local biz folks - who were so supportive!

Saturday: We had our first Relay for Life Kick -off Event. The committee had a powerpoint presentation, prizes to raffle off, and hot dogs and drinks for the attendees.. just to get the word out - Jeff and I are both loving this opportunity to give back and be part of something like Relay For Life (saving that for another post! haha)

Saturday afternoon: After the kick off, we spent 1.5 hours @ the Anthem waterpark... love that place... a great place where Jeff and I can sit in the water and relax while letting the kids go hog wild.. on the slides.. the play ground that is smack dap in the middle of the pool and the diving boards... We have two diving boards, one VERY VERY tall and one at a normal height... Will decided to try the HIGH HIGH one but when he got to the top he changed his mind.. gotta give him kudos for trying!

Then home for a quick rest (30 min nap for me) and off to HAnk's hockey game! he scored another goal (his 2nd) in the game and he was a proud kiddo... he truly loves all things  hockey! the amazing transformation from when he started "skating lessons" to now has been amazing to witness... it is so awesome to see you kids excel  and enjoy themselves!

Right after hockey, we went to another friends house for dinner! they are moving way and we will surely miss them. Will has been friends w. their daughter Bridey since kindergarten.. they just clicked... and its fun to watch the two of them because they are true best friends... They came over for dinner a few weeks ago and when they left at that time we thought that would be the last time we see them for a while (they are moving to cali in june) and when they left Will cried.. poor guy was so heart broken.. Well we got another chance to see them once more before they left.. we we drove away, Bridey ran down the street chasing our truck and Will yelled good bye out the window and then threw in an "I love you" as we sped off.. it was like out of a movie or something... warmed my heart... He has one other girl that is a buddy here in Anthem, but none of his friends even compare to how he feels about Bridey - and it is so cute, even after 4 years of knowing each other!

Sunday morning... Jeff slept in... I got up and snuggled w. the boys on the couch and watched the Last Mimzey and part of the Transformers movie... that was great mommy time... i love snuggling up and watching movies w. the boys... After Jeff got up and made us breakfast burritos... we went off to Home Depot to buy cement! Whohoo..then the rest of the day was weeding , mowing, trimming and pouring cement to finish a wall we are building... backyard project info to come later.....

We ended the day by having Ray's pizza and wings and ALL of us felt into bed fast asleep!

stay tuned for details about the "Dung Dood's"

I survived.........

Well…

I was driving to the local smoothie place w. the boys and I noticed a motorcycle cop behind me.. so of course,I made sure I was not Texting while driving, or talking on my phone, and that I was obeying the speed limit… not yelling at the kids or throwing random objects at them while driving to get them to quiet down.. you know the typical mom stuff!!

He follows me pretty closely for awhile and then all of a sudden he is right beside my passenger window… peering at me… I actually jumped from surprise… he smiled and kept driving… so by then I was really on edge…. The whole thing was weird. I pull into the shopping center and so does he.. oh great, I am thinking I am in trouble for all those times I was on the phone while driving or speeding through the school zone or something…

He waits for me to pass him and I pull into a parking space and he pulls in to the one next to me. I am holding my breath and I look over and he motions me to roll down my window.. you know that guesture to roll down the window with such authority that I am sure I am getting some sort of random ticket (like the WASTE of finite ticket I received 15 years ago… that is a story for another day)

So, I roll down the window and say HI in my cutest, most flirtatious way possible… hoping… He said “I just had to ask you what your license plate means?”  - WTF I can’t hold in my shock, my heart is racing even fast now, because now I am highly annoyed… all of that drama to find out what the plate means (I think it is pretty self explanatory, but whatever!)

 

I  have a pink ribbon on the bank of my van and a pink ribbon topper for my antennae I am thinking DUH! Hahah

So I explain that it says “I Survived” – and that I am a cancer survivor.. He then begins to tell me the following:

“Oh really.. well I just had to ask, because, I don’t know if you realize it or not but it looks like it says “I survive VD” – and I thought I would double check with you, isn’;t that funny?” 

At this point, I am not sure what to say, both of the boys are in the van with me.. and I absolutely do NOT want to explain VD to them… I just chuckle and say Oh yeh, I guess I never thought of that…” Then he said well, have a nice day and drove off…

I can tell he is so enamored with himself for being so funny and I am just plain annoyed at this point and I am still a little shaking, trying to recover from the fear of possibly getting a ticket and then to realize why he pulled me over.. I need a margarita not a smoothie! I supposed it would of helped if he was a hottie cop, like Eric Estrada.. but he was so not…….

So.. here is another story from the bizzaro world of Rachel…